fighting feelings of perceived laziness

Why put off til tomorrow that you can do today, right now even, five minutes ago...even better. When Kelly gets stressed out, she doesn't procrastinate, she goes into overdrive, but it has to be productive.

it's the being productive part that I grapple with.

I am normally a productive person anyway. Most people would think me more along the lines of an energizer bunny than a slow turtle. I get shit done. When I am stressed though, I tend to take on big overwhelming projects. This current bout of stress is a bit different than others though. There is not enough productivity in my day to feel as if I have been productive enough.

In the last month I have been cleaning house. Room by room, cleaning house. Pierre's goal was to move (eventually) with 10% less stuff. I have been going through the house and tackling the 10% in every room. Yes, every room. Don't worry, most of it has gone to the trash or recycling, stuff that is not usable by anyone any more, like 40 year old pocket novels that were losing pages when I was in high school.
I have been working on my white board list too, it's just that right now, knitting doesn't feel like I am being productive enough...despite the fact that a pair of stockings takes a good three months of knitting, and I am already thinking about buying more yarn.

And those wondering, the dissertation is stalled. Not completely forgotten/abandoned, just stalled. It needs a rest, then I can turn it over and get it started again.

until then I knit...and clean.